回想録|高1のリュウくんが20歳メガりゅうくんに会いに行く
どうも！高校一年生のリュウです！
今日はフィクション小説を書きます！20歳の自分に会いに行ったらどうなるか？ってことで、会いに行きたいと思います！
20歳ってことはきっと東大駒場で二年生をやっているでしょうね！一体どの科類に入学したのだろうか楽しみです。『ドラゴン桜』に憧れて東大を目指したから、理科一類かなあ。
では、さっそく見ていきましょう！レッツゴー！！
2020年1月
へぇ～！この時代にもTwitterはあるのか～！！そしてこれが将来の自分か！！「メガりゅうくん」？？メガってどういう意味なんだろう…。
どうも！こんにちは☆メガりゅうです！！
「メガ」はメガシンカの意味だ！残念ながら今作で廃止されてしまったのだが…。
えっ！マジっすか！？ガルーラはおしまいですね！
おっと…。あまり関係のない話をするとSEO上問題だ…。
20歳で東大に入っていないの！？
未来の自分は20歳！東大の何類に入学したのですか？
…
残念だが、まだ東大には入学していない。出願を忘れてしまってな…。
今思うと、過去の自分に本当に申し訳ない。自分史（高校生編）を執筆していて思うのだが、高校時代の自分は輝いていた。将来に希望と不安を持ち、恋愛よりも受験を優先し勉強していた。
その代わり、慶應経済に入学して楽しくやってるよ。
そ、そんな！そんなのイヤですよ！！
東大に入学しないと幸せになれないじゃないですか！
東大に入らないと幸せになれない！？
確かに、高校時代の私は、そのように考えていた。東大に入れないなら生きている価値はない、と。
確かに、東大には入れなかったが、受験を通じて友達はたくさんできた。SNSでの影響力は十分にあり、自由に意見発信できる。こうしてブログを書いているだけで収入がもらえる。
東大に入らないでインターネット上で意見発信するなんて、みっともない！恥さらしですよ！！
東大に受かってからやればいいじゃないですか！
過去の私はそう考えていた。東大に受かるまでは受験に専念し、受かったら勉強を放棄して思いっきり遊ぶ、と。
しかし、失われた時間は帰ってこない。過去を振り返ると「もっと遊んでおけばよかった」と後悔することもある。
だから私は決めた。受験勉強は重要だが、そればかりにとらわれずに色々なことに挑戦していこう、と。
そんな…。
東大なんて、いつでも行ける。私には十分な学力は備わっている。別に22歳になったら入学してもいいし、25歳でも、30歳でも、好きな年齢で入学すればいい。
そりゃ、何浪してでも東大に行くという考えがありますからね。
そうだ。それでいい。なにも現役合格にこだわる必要はない。
好きな年齢で大学に通えるように、今はお金を貯めているのだ。こんな幸せな生活はないだろう。
東大へ行きたいという気持ちは、今はもうほとんどない。でも、過去の自分のために、私は東大を受け続けるのだ。
過去の自分への申し訳なさ
過去の自分は、かっこよかった。受験に真剣に取り組み、日本を主導する人間になりたいと願っていた。
高校一年生の時の将来の夢は、
①東大を卒業する
②外務省にキャリア組で入省する
③キャリア経験を積んだのち、国会議員に立候補する
④当選回数を重ね外務大臣に抜擢される
でしたからね。
そうだ。当時は、自分の生活よりも、国家に身をささげて仕事に取り組みたいと願っていた。
尖閣諸島沖漁船衝突事件（民主党・カン政権）を見て、日本の「弱腰外交」を残念に思った。
高校生が感じる、政府への不満が東大受験を助長していた。
今は外務省に入りたいと思ってないのですか？
全く思っていない。外務省に入れたからといって、自由に外交ができるわけではない。ただのロボットになってしまう。
だったら、YouTubeやブログで自分の意見を発信し、多くの人に読んでもらえるようにしたほうがいい。
人の考えは変わるものですね。
「東大至上主義」思想を持っていた過去の自分と、いろいろなことに挑戦していこうとする現在の自分、考え方は異なるが昔の「東大至上主義時代」があったからこそ、今の自分がある。どっちのころの考えが正しいかは分からない。過去に戻りたいと思うときは頻繁にある。
過去の自分に言いたい。ごめん。こんな堕落しちゃって。
東大には合格できなかった。だが、過去の自分が勉強した内容は、今の生活にとても役立っている。
高校時代の自分は、将来に悩むことが多かった。
今みたいに自分に自信はなかった。
難関高校に通う他人が優れていると羨ましく感じていた。
悲しくて泣くこともあった。
もしも本当に過去の自分に会って話ができるのであれば、言ってあげたい。
今のままでいいんだよ。その努力は、あとで報われるから、と。
https://microsoftexchangeserversupport.com/export-microsoft-exchange-mailboxes-to-pst/
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